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| Lovelocks on bridge at Bakewell, Derbyshire |
And this belief is by no means new. Leo Tolstoy,
for example, opined: “To say that you can love one person all
your life is just like saying that one candle will continue to burn as long as
you live.”
Or what about this little gem from 19th
century Irish poet, Thomas Moore:
”Romantic love is an illusion. Most of us
discover this truth at the end of a love affair or else when the sweet emotions
of love lead us into marriage and then turn down their flames.”
Even women have expressed similar sentiments: According to Goldie Hawn: “Monogamy is impossible these days for both sexes. I
don’t know anyone who’s faithful or wants to be.”
The late film actress Katherine Hepburn
advised: “If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men
for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married.“
And this quote from Bette Davis takes the
biscuit! “An affair now and then is good for a marriage.
It adds spice, stops it from getting boring… I ought to know.”
So that’s all right then. Sorry no, it
isn’t, and I challenge the assumption that men were programmed to spread their
seed while women are merely seeking sound physical specimens with which to
procreate. These propositions may be all very well for evolutionists but not
for people who feel love and sex should be viewed as something higher. And if
you accept the Bible’s account, then you’ll no doubt believe, as I do, that
true romance can and should last forever.
Whether they believe in it or not, most
of us are acquainted with Genesis and the first marriage between Adam and Eve,
two perfect humans who were joined together by their Creator. What you may not
have realised is that their partnership was meant to last a great deal longer
than your average Golden Wedding Anniversary. How do we know?
Well, in Genesis 2:17, God warned the
couple not to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and bad - for in doing so
they did so, they would die. The rest is history. Adam and Eve ate the
forbidden fruit, became imperfect and, sure enough, began to grow old and turn
to dust. But, let’s just suppose they hadn’t disobeyed their Creator.
Would they have died? Would they have aged? Would they still be happily married?
The Bible, of course, encourages the
highest form of love, love for God who insists on exclusive devotion. (Exodus
20:1-5). Scripture rarely touches on romantic love but, when it does, it
stresses the need for loyalty, exclusivity and, yes, everlasting love. Check
out Proverbs 5:18,19 which describes the ‘constant’ love of a man for his wife.
And for pure romance, consider these beautiful verses from the Song of Solomon (Canticles)
Chapter 8 verses 6 &7:
“Set me as a seal upon your heart,
as a seal upon your arm;
for love is strong as death,
passion fierce as the grave.
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
a raging flame.
Many waters cannot quench love,
neither can floods drown it.
If one offered for love
all the wealth of one’s house,
it would be utterly scorned.” (New Revised Standard Version)
as a seal upon your arm;
for love is strong as death,
passion fierce as the grave.
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
a raging flame.
Many waters cannot quench love,
neither can floods drown it.
If one offered for love
all the wealth of one’s house,
it would be utterly scorned.” (New Revised Standard Version)
Why settle for
anything less?
Monogamy in animals
Incidentally, many
animals enjoy lifelong relationships with their mates. Wolves, beavers, eagles and even termites are
thought to be monogamous while swans are renowned for their fidelity. But for
sheer fidelity, one creature tops them all: The stork.
In Hebrew, this bird’s name
is ‘chasi-dhah’, which means ‘loyal one; one of loving kindness’, signifying
its enduring faithfulness to its mate and exceptionally long-lasting, tender
care for its young. You’ll see it on many greeting cards for new parents,
usually carrying a baby in its enormous beak.
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